A Time For Everything

Recently I was reading a scripture that is well known to my heart. But on this particular day, my Father revealed more to me through the soaking in of the verses than I had ever gleaned before.
It was Ecclesiastes 3... The chapter that talks about there being a season for everything. My eyes scanned and my heart listened:

There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven—

      

A time to give birth and a time to die;

      A time to plant and a time to uproot what is planted.

      A time to kill and a time to heal;

      A time to tear down and a time to build up.

      A time to weep and a time to laugh;

      A time to mourn and a time to dance.

      A time to throw stones and a time to gather stones;

      A time to embrace and a time to shun embracing.

      A time to search and a time to give up as lost;

      A time to keep and a time to throw away.

      A time to tear apart and a time to sew together;

      A time to be silent and a time to speak.

      A time to love and a time to hate;

       A time for war and a time for peace.

And though I know the words and have etched them into my brain, in many ways, they have not reached full depth in my heart. As I read, I began to realize that I have my own little set of rules for my life and this scripture just seems to break them all. I read, "A time to keep and a time to throw away"  or "A time to embrace and a time to shun embracing." or "A time to be silent and a time to speak". Inside I feel my heart tug and pipe up with questioning, "Isn't it always a good time to keep? Should I ever throw away? And to shun embracing? That sounds contrary to all I know.... And if it's a good point shouldn't I always speak?" 

But there it is. Seasons for everything. There will be time to mend relationships and a time when the Lord knows they must be pulled apart. There will be times that He asks me to speak out, and a time He asks that I be silent. There will be times for me to mourn and then He will make me dance again. There are times when I need to be persistent in searching for something or in holding on tightly and a time when I need to give up what was lost and let go. 

I don't think these scriptures are talking about fabric, seeds, or lost pocket change. I think they are beautifully addressing relationships, life, choices, desires, and disappointments. As I read these verses, I see my little rule book pop up saying that death, tearing down, giving up on something lost, or throwing away is never okay. And maybe that's why I resist when these things come into my life... As if something is wrong. I search for the answer to that nagging question, "Why?" and feel like something unnatural is taking place. When in fact, it's quite the contrary. 

Pain, distance, loss, being uprooted, and tears are a very natural part of life. And in a way it's comforting. There are seasons for everything and I have to trust the Maker and orchestrate of these seasons. It gives me peace when I see the situations in my life where it's just not all perfect. I realize that laying down a dream in order to embrace a new season is part of life... A time to keep and a time to throw away.  I find that walking closely with every single person I love isn't possible, there is the distance that miles put in between us that just hurts... A time to plant and a time to uproot what is planted. I see that there are times when I feel like speaking up and speaking out that I just need to be silent... A time to be silent and a time to speak. 

And you know what? When I lay down my little rule-book for life I am comforted. It makes me appreciate the hope that walking next my Jesus brings. It takes the fear out of all the "bad stuff" that could happen in life. It makes me trust the arms of a faithful Father who said He'd never leave me. Life's journey is amazing, breathtaking, painful, hard, and so worth it. And it's never what we expected it to be. No, in fact it's so much more. 

If I'm honest, I'm not going to say that I don't have a few favorites when it comes to seasons of life and a few I wish I could skip. But if I'm really honest, I'd have to admit that many of the times my heart deepened and grew the most were through the hard times. The times that had it been up to me, I would have skipped. So maybe I should trust the one who gives and takes away and the one who makes the spring and winter. There is a season for everything and a time for every event under heaven. And if I've got a comforter who walks next to me and I'm following a God who uses everything for good, I can throw that rulebook out. Let the winds of the changing season shift... I'm walking next to the strongest Father in the whole world. 

God of the Messy Moments

The thought hit me with perfect clarity. And clarity on a day like today was something I wasn't expecting. The kids are trying to make their way out of sickness and it seems that where sickness has been, attitudes and tears abound. Getting anything done felt like the old, "Three steps forward, two steps back."
It was just a messy day.

And that's when it hit me. God is well acquainted with messy days. He knows all about dusty feet, feeding hungry people, and the ways of children. The thing that I realized the clearest was this: Somewhere in my heart I relate to God as though there are levels of importance of what I can and can't come to Him and ask Him for help with. I hear that someone has cancer and I feel immediately that this warrants a talk with the Almighty God. But when it comes to snotty noses and trying to tackle a large to-do list, coming before the Father seems petty. But it's not.

It was today as I stooped to clean up another mess, that I realized that the Lord doesn't have limited time like we do. Sometimes I think we all relate to Him like He's on a time schedule or efficiently managing His day by prioritizing His children's request. When the truth is, He's outside of time and so we can always go to Him. He's the One that didn't let the sandals of the children of Israel wear out as they wandered for 40 years in the desert. He's the One who put on a towel in His last remaining hours that He had to live and stooped to wash the dirty feet of a group of men. His first miracle was performed because someone miscalculated how much drink they'd need at a wedding.

To be perfectly honest, to ask the God who formed mountains as though they were play dough  and flung stars in the sky like diamonds spilled on black velvet to take a moment to remember that sandals are wearing out or wedding refreshments are running low just seems petty. And the thought of spending the last few precious hours of Jesus-on-earth time wrapped up in a towel rubbing roadside grime off of feet just blows my mind.

He's the One who was born alongside the residents of a little Bethlehem barn. The greeting that this earth gave the King of Kings was to lay in a bed of hay in the feed trough of the animals.
So He's knows the messiness of being human. He knows that we have needs. He understands the day-to-day dust that we accumulate.

Why does He have such patience for all of this? He's after our hearts. So even if you're not facing job loss, cancer, or an impending natural disaster, come to Him and ask for mercy, grace, and patience. He wants every part of our hearts and sometimes He uses the chisel of speeding tickets, spills, long work hours, tight budgets, diaper changing, broken appliances, and snotty noses to chip away at the barriers between us and Him and draw us closer together. And in His kingdom, it doesn't matter what means is used to bring us closer to Him, if it's accomplishing a purifying work in our hearts, it's worth eternal value.

So will you join me? Will you join me in heading straight to the Father during the stressful moments and the difficult days? Will you join me in ceasing to compartmentalize and just let God's mercy and grace flow freely into every nook and cranny and area of our life and hearts? Will you join me in offering up every single moment, every little trial, every meaningless task we accomplish to Him? Can we ask Him to use those things to deepen and strengthen us? Jesus spent His time on earth with fishermen, tax collectors, and the humblest of society. Those were the ones He took time to offer grace and mercy to. And the truth is.... if He's taking time for me, not much has changed.

5 Five-Minute Ways to Bless and Romance Your Husband

Truth? I often don't like things with titles that promise big results for the smallest amount of work when it comes to the really important things in life like relationships. I shy away from books that promise a brand new husband or child within the week with 5 easy steps or the devotionals that are paired down so much that you can knock out reading an entire day's worth in 3 minutes. But, the truth is, that while long evenings, big conversations, and large gestures are certainly part of and absolutely needed in marriage, the small, every-day things are equally as important.

It's the exchange of love, friendship, desire, and encouragement every single day that makes a good marriage. It's incredibly easy to get going with life and forget the little things which are just as needed as the big date nights. 

All that to say, here are 5 five-minute ways to daily bless, encourage, and love on your husband that will undoubtedly put a big smile on that man's face. And which one of us doesn't love that sweetheart's grin? 

1. Text him. I know this doesn't work for everyone, but I have found it a great way to send encouragement, compliments, appreciation, and even a little spicy loving his way during the day. Be sweet and vulnerable and put your heart into it, and he'll get it. I've found that it works so much better that a phone call and it brightens his whole day up. You can also supplement this with writing a little note if that's more your style. 

2. Be affectionate. Reach out and hold his hand, rub his shoulders, stroke his face, lean on his shoulder or chest, and greet him with a kiss. It sounds crazy simple and like "good marriage 101" but I've been surprised at how often it's easy to forget these little things. 

3. Find new ways to compliment him. I don't know a man who doesn't absolutely love being complimented.  Compliment his strength, his work, the way he looks, the things he says, his insights into life, the way he thinks about things, the way he is as a daddy, and of course what you love about being married to him. Sometimes it's just the simple things like, "I love how you think and the way you see life." or "Goodness, you are just incredible. How did I ever land a guy as sweet as you?" 

4. Set an atmosphere. I think all men like the way a woman puts her touch on a home. Make his evenings feel special by creating a relaxing and inviting atmosphere. If he's tired, make a refreshing drink to give him and make preparations for an evening that will be relaxing to him (I emphasized that because sometimes the things we ladies like and appreciate are so different than what the guys enjoy). On a daily basis, light candles, bring fresh flowers into the house, make your home smell delicious, keep fresh sheets and fluffy pillows on the bed, and the home nicely picked up. A drink set out in a pitcher or a snack out on the counter is a sure way to make a man happy at the end of a long day! Though a lot of the small touches I mentioned sound feminine, I think most men enjoy an inviting place to rest at the end of the day. He may never be able to put his finger on the specific touches or think to compliment the tiny details, but the overall effect will be one he loves! 

5. Change it up. It's so so easy for any of us to get stuck in a rut. You end up with certain terms of endearment you call each other, certain things you thank each other for, and even certain displays of affection that become so normal that you start not even noticing them. It's a sweet thing to have a routine, but it's also important just to change up the tiny things. Call him a sweetie name that you don't normally call him. If you always sit by him and hold hands, go sit down on his lap instead. Do something extra, unexpected, and out of the ordinary. It's can still be simple and it doesn't take any more time, just more thought and consideration. The important thing, is that changing it up keeps you being vulnerable and putting your heart out there. It also leave him wondering what wonderful thing will be next and makes you adventurous and fun to be married to. And don't we all want our husbands to feel that way about us? 

10 Things That Will Change Your Life

These are some of the most basic and simple truths in God. But I find that the more I actually believe them and realize them in heart... My life is changed. 

1. We have nothing to fear. In Him we can chose to oblitorate everything from worry, to anxiety, to heart gripping terror. If He will never leave or forsake us and if the God of the universe if for us and not against us, why would we fear? His perfect love casts out fear. This is still changing my life. 

2. His joy is our strength. Joy? Joy can make you strong? That is exactly what He says! And which one of us doesn't feel weak? 

3. We are never alone. He is always with us, to the ends of the earth. He's right beside us. Oh why do we go about living our lives so often as if He isn't? 

4. He is faithful. He just is. No matter what, no matter how shaky we feel, He is a constant and He will always be a faithful God. 

5. He is near. He's not a far off, distant, unreachable, stoic, god who looks down on us. He is near... closer than a brother he said. After all, does even the closest person to you know how many hairs you have on your head? 

6. He sees you. Even when you feel alone or overlooked by every other person, He knows your every thought and your every step. He even knows when you sit down and stand up. He knows you. Why do we ever try to hide? 

7. He is our provider. Look at the birds and remember how He said that they are fed and taken care of... How much more will He look after us? He will provide for our physical needs, emotional needs, and spiritual needs if we trust Him. 

8. He came to bring us life.... So that we might have it abundantly. Wow. The Son of God wrapped Himself in this frail package of humanity, walked the earth, and died upon a cross, so that we might have life? Why don't we take Him up on this extended hand of mercy that He endured so much to give us?

9. He works all things together for good. When we offer our steps to Him and yield to His way, He uses every situation in our lives for good. Knowing that makes hope permeate every season of our lives. 

10. At the end of it all, we get to spend eternity with Him. We get to live at His feet and ask Him all the questions we've waited an eternity to ask. We will see the streets of gold. Finally we will be united with the entire family of God from around the world and through all the ages. So at the end of it all, why do we ever fear or feel hopeless? What hope we have in Him! 

Courageously Content

Do you know that look that newborn babies have? You know that face, the one with puffy cheeks, soft fragrant skin, milk-lined-lips pushed out, and eyes closed as they let out a soft sigh that makes a half smile grace their tiny mouth? It's like the epitome of contentment.
They are simply happy to be in the arms of the parent... Total trust, total insertion of everything they are into the moment, so happy to just be alive.

I can distinctly remember nights when I've gone to lay down one of my children to sleep and my heart has been in turmoil. There on a tiny cot on the floor or in a rocking chair my heart churns with worry, grief, sadness, or fear as they drift into peaceful sleep. Something about the contrast melts my heart and often makes tears grace my cheeks. So many times I have looked down at their small face, the door of their mind closing along with their eyes as they make the exit from the day and an entrance into the dreamworld of the night. An almost longing sweeps over me. They lay there, body yielded fully into mine, not a care in the world. Blissfully they sleep without any knowledge of the world going on around them and sometimes I wish I could join them there... Come away from my world of current events, hard relationships, grief, worry, headlines, and pressures and into their world of just feeling safe because mama is rocking them and daddy locks the door at night and that is all that matters. And I wonder... Is that how Jesus felt when He was asleep in the boat while the storm raged on? So sure and trusting of His Father that He could sleep when the world around Him tossed and turned?

Children are blessed with beautiful innocence. They have full trust and contentment because they are blissfully ignorant to the hard and dark world around them. We are not. And yet we can still be just as content as a baby asleep in it's mother's arms.... Only for us, it's not the absence of knowing what there is to fear, it's the present choice of knowing who to trust. And that is why we can be courageously content.

Contentment is not passivity, lack of movement, or simply having no vision. Contentment is inserting ourselves fully into every single moment that we have be graciously given and living in full trust. It's reminding ourselves and believing the truth that He has never left us alone and He is the provider of everything we need. It's not allowing ourselves to be caught up in the regrets of the past or a lust for the future, but instead fully giving ourselves to what he has right in front of us. It's not allowing our eyes to wander and be captured by the seduction of status, hype, possessions, or material things but instead being totally captivated by Him alone. It's making the choice, moment by moment.

Will you join me in choosing to live a life that is courageously content? 

Something A Little Extra, Something A Little Fun...

 It was a very ordinary Monday a few weeks ago and I was tired. The day had been amazing and productive yet quite exhausting in it's own way. The day was getting late and we were all feeling like we had reached our expiration dates (you know what I mean?). It would have been nice if it was one of those daddy-comes-home-early-and-takes-everyone-out-to-eat nights, but that night was a daddy-has-to-work-late-night. I went and rummaged through the cabinets for something to make the kids and pretty much found a bunch of random ingredients that didn't amount to much (we really needed to go to the store!). I found something for their main dinner and started it cooking and as I looked around our darkening kitchen, I knew I needed to do it. I just needed to make this a fun night. No, I really didn't feel like it. No, it wasn't a special occasion. But it was one of those ordinary moments that I needed to make just a little special.

I pulled out a tiny table from the kids room and put it in the kitchen and told the kids that I would be their waitress for the night. They were delighted and immediately began calling me "Sir" for the rest of the evening (go figure!). After getting them started on their main meal, I looked through the cabinets for some kind of treat. I found popcorn, brown sugar, and marshmallows (I have no idea why we even had them!). I could do something with this! I told the kids I would be doing a "cooking show" while they ate which pretty much amounted to me talking in a very important voice while I mixed random ingredients in front of two little kids. But they liked it.

I made a simple caramel with the brown sugar and poured it over the popped popcorn and then tore small pieces of the marshmallow over the top, put them in tiny oven-safe bowls and broiled them in the oven to melt the marshmallow and make it all toasty on the top. It actually turned out delicious! The kids were so blessed by me making a little extra effort to love on them on a night when we were all tired.


My point is:
1. Caramel popcorn with toasty marshmallows is delish!
2. We mama's can really make an impact on our families by putting aside our own tiredness and needs and doing the little extra things to make life fun, exciting, memorable, and creative. We can be the ones to make moments for laughing, sharing, crying, talking, and connecting by just putting a little thought and effort into the day. It doesn't have to be big, fancy, complicated, or expensive, we can simply take what we have and make the ordinary extraordinary by putting our heart and creative ideas into all that we do. Be childlike, whimsical, and creative. I would encourage you to find something a little extra and a little fun to do with your ordinary days! I'll be over here mixing ingredients and talking in fake accents for my little kids. :)

10 Creative Dates Ideas For You and Your Sweetheart

 A few new ideas to spice up the marriage and bring a little unexpected smile to my man's face is always a welcome thing in my book. When you're parents of young kids, life can be a little bit of a whirlwind and sometimes you have to just make yourselves put up the duplos and sweep up the runaway cheerios and do something for just the two of you. Here are 10 ideas to do just that:

1. Have a Food Tasting Night
Pick a favorite food like chocolate, cheese, bread, ice cream, or even coffee and have your own little tasting party with it. Go to the store and get a selections of all different kinds of the food, from all over the country or the world, all different selections and flavors. Take it on a picnic or bring it home and arrange it on some pretty trays and feed each other, taste and try them all.

2. Be Coffee Shop Bums For the Night
Find a local coffee shop, grab some lattes, maybe bring a deck of cards or a few board games, and set up to laugh, drink, play, and talk for the night. Finding one with live music is even more fun!

3. Breakfast in Bed.... At Night
Why not have breakfast in bed at night? There's a hundred delish breakfast recipes you can make, get trays, tuck yourselves in bed (after the kids are asleep!), and enjoy!

4. Take Dance Lessons
Nathan and I have been doing this for several months and it has been SUCH a blast. We laugh, learn, and just get to have a ball with it. It's a great activity for learning to work together, lead/follow, and flow. And it's just fun to know how to dance!!!

5. Make a Game Night
Break out the board games, pop some popcorn, grab your fav snacks and drinks, and play some games on the floor or laying on your tummies like kids on your bed. Use your imagination to add "rules" to make it a little extra flirty. Sure to be a home run!

6. Have a Progressive Dinner
Pull out one of your prettiest dresses and get ready for some fine-dining! Start with appetizers at one restaurant, soup and salad at the another, a main course at another, and finish it off with an incredible dessert and coffee at your final destination. It's a fun way to get to try different restaurants and makes dinner time an extended experience, giving you plenty of time to make eyes at each other and talk. You can try to make it a cohesive meal or try and make it as random and miss matched as possible.

7. A Night of Giving
Agree ahead of time to do three things for each other... Write something, make something, and buy something. Give your notes or poems at the beginning of the night, what you made in the middle, and what you bought at the very end of the night. You can use this as a fun spin on a date out or an evening at home.

8. Get to Know Each Other Even Better
Look up some fun personality tests online! It's always fun to learn more about how your spouse thinks processes, and sees the world. It's interesting to get a window into each other's world and it can be fun and even very helpful. You can also look up one of those newlywed games that has a ton of questions and print them out for the evening. I'm sometimes surprised at my husband's answers to questions about his favorites or preferences. This kind of thing bonds you, and makes you feel like you're getting to know your sweetheart all over again.

9. Make a Time Capsule
Collect tickets, list your favorite songs, a few pictures, random things you are currently enjoying, mementos, etc. and make a time capsule with it. Try and bury it if you can, if not hide it away. Someday when you're older, you and your kids will love pulling it out and looking through it.

10. Take a Cooking Class
Sign up for a fun cooking class or demonstration and just have fun learning together. If you can't find one in your town, there are plenty of fun cooking shows that you can stream online and learn lots from. It's always fun to get outside your comfort zone and try something new! And what better way to do that than with some good food?